So what kind of person is Taylor Swift? You know how there are some artists that'll come up to you while you're DJing and request their owns songs? And there are some that'll be hype if you play their song, but they'd never dare request it? And then there are those that are so disgusted by your shameless pandering that they leave the venue the second they hear you play their track? So yea, which one is 13? Asking for a friend.
I know we're all busy grinding away at our "day jobs" or whatever, but surely we can take time to talk about Taylor Swift's Red. Because, as expected, it's the best album in the history of the world. So yea, I may be minimally biased seeing as how I run what has essentially become a T. Swift fan fiction blog and I'm wearing a "We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together" shirt and this, that, the other. Irrelevant. The singles released thus far? Magical. Simply splendid. "Stay Stay Stay," "Starlight," "22," blah, blah, blah? You cannot deny the power of these songs. Great job, T. You're perfect and wonderful.
Taylor. You know I love you and I'd never want to hurt you. But please girl. For the love of all things good and holy. Please stop releasing your album one song at a time. They don't all need to be singles, T. I love you. Please remember that when you read what I'm about to say. But this is starting to feel less like an album and more like Taylor Swift's Greatest Hits of 2012. Honestly. I want an album. Not an anthology. OK? Yeesh.
Let's talk about this Macy's commercial with Taylor Swift. Some Mr. Manager is talking about who knows what and I'm all, "Alright, commercial, tuning out." Next thing I know I see Yung Beautiful Taylor Swift lock hands with him and they swing each other around like they're in mega-love. Do you have any idea what I'd give/do/etc. for that experience? I'd pay every penny in my bank account just to be in the studio when that was filmed. I'd sell my very soul for the chance to spin around in circles with Taylor. And to have her lift me up?!
And to think that some guy got paid to live out my wildest dreams. "Whatever."
So I Googled "Taylor Swift favorite food" because I just had to see if T. and I like all the same stuff. Like pizza and Kraft macaroni and cheese and chips (all of them) and the such. And I come across some stupid (awesome) forum for Taylor Swift fans and they're all listing their favorite foods. And oh my goodness Taylor's fans eat true garbage. For example:
Anything from Panda Express (-:
Butter Braids! (a pastery)
Now don't get me wrong. I love these foods. I will eat them all. In the same sitting, even. I'll mash them into a ball of fat and snort it. I don't care. I'm fat. But we're talking favorite food here. Not "something I'll eat even though it'll give me indigestion because it tastes kinda good." Panda Express is not favorite food-worthy. GTFO, 13 fans.